Crop circles

When I told Sean I was choosing crop circles, he rolled his eyes and said, “They’re man-made. Come on!” Then he punched me in the throat.

OK, seriously, crop circles have always freaked me out. And “Signs” had nothing to do with it. That movie was not scary, nor did it convince me there are aliens, at least not the Sleestak rip-off kind that were in that movie.

I understand that supposedly crop circles are “natural” or man-made, but really? WHO has that kind of time on their hands? Even I don’t—and you all know I have a lot. There is just something eerie and supernatural about crop circles, at least to me. Some patterns are so elaborate that I don’t know who’d want to put in the time to pull this off. Have you seen some of those designs? And if they are man-made, how is it no one has been caught? However, and sadly, I learned that some morons were actually given a Nobel Prize for “crop circle hoaxing.” No, I’m not making that up. I wish I was.

Besides, “Once you go into that circle, the weather never changes. It is always 67 degrees with a 40 percent chance of rain. Always.” [/“Waiting for Guffman”]

Crop circles—natural, man-made, the Great Gazzo paying a visit to the earth’s crops and just messing with us or a reason to give Reynolds Wrap tin foil some business?